misery
blood is like river gushing forth,
this is the reason i reach for the blade.
the pain inside me is never ending,
one day i hope it will end.
stop, they are always telling me,
but they dont know pain.
The constant misery and sadness,
and how it never goes away.
i think of ending it all,
sometimes i even try,
but when i wake up,
im glad i failed.
my friends say they care for me,
some may actually do,
but throughout all this,
i know in my heart that i am alone.
the abuse and the neglect,
nobody i know has suffered this.
so how can i expect them to understand,
when i all i want is peace.
to sit alone in my blood,
to no longer feel empty,
this is my life,
the way it has to be.
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Update
Well, I have been working on my meditations and trying to raise my bio-electricity levels so I would feel better. When they are high enough, then I'm going to try and contact my GD.
I have also been in contact with many of Father's followers, and they are helping in my understanding of things.
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